does he mean his path to Rome?
Was it a road on which he discovered the God
that to go to war in Iraq gave him the nod?
No book buyers expected the language to bring Churchill to mind
and indeed they got prose of quite a different kind.
As the title has a distinctly biblical sound
its content will most readers confound.
Do they really want to be told how at night he “devoured” his spouse
with an ardour that must have rocked the house?
He hints he first did it with the only girl at his school
and in the telling you can almost see him drool.
On John Prescott for dallying with his diary lady he lays no blame
and seems to imply he would have loved to do the same.
When he tells he recruited “sexy and exuberant” Anji Hunter as his assistant
are we expected to wonder whether to her charms he was resistant?
When reading these accounts, perhaps best left unheeded,
one can only ask where was Barbara Cartland when she was needed?
That people have balls he likes to claim,
though not the kind used in a tennis game.
His “genius” spin doctor Alastair Campbell’s are “clanking and great”
and of Tony’s enemies must have sealed the fate.
He brags his own diary lady could “squeeze very hard those of anyone who interfered”
leaving us to assume her master looked on and enthusiastically cheered.
Although media mogul Murdoch on Blair did his best to put the screw
he assures us “outsider Rupert has balls” too.
The only Balls he does not admire is Ed who the Labour Party aspires to lead
a plan Tony is making every effort to impede.
He accuses Ed Balls of being an intellectual and left-leaning,
seemingly unaware that in a Labour Party that is the whole meaning.
When he decided the Party should become more like the Tory
Tony hoped he would cover himself in glory.
But the New Labour he invented is in danger of becoming a joke
and of fading out of sight just like the New Coke.
When he says he admires Margaret Thatcher and her very great effect
does he include the railway system she so effectively wrecked?
About the Iraq war he insists he was right
although the weapons he claims existed were never in sight.
Why Dr. David Kelly committed suicide he says he does not know
while many more intelligent and forthright than Tony claim that is not so.
That the book would be self-serving could be foreseen
but why against his successor did he spill so much spleen?
He confesses his relationship was “very, very difficult” with Brown
although it was he who anointed Gordon and placed on him the crown.
Not knowing quite what to do with him he sought the best advice
and about consulting Sir Alex Ferguson he did not ponder twice.
Who better to guide him than the manager of a football team?
That Sir Alex had so many balls at his command raised him in Tony’s esteem.
Whatever the advice, Tony to Gordon as Prime Minister gave the name,
so it is too late to try to someone else pass the blame.
Brown from number 11 to 10 Downing Street at first did not want to go
the reason for which many wanted to know.
He had been warned by a domestic who knew the house outside and in
that when Tony departed he left behind his ghastly grin.
So Gordon had to call in ghost busters the spectre to exorcise
before he could make the move and enjoy his long sought prize.
About going to war Tony expresses no regrets
despite claiming he feels anguish and says he sometimes frets.
He wonders why he is criticised because he did not heed
the intelligence given to him by Hans Blix, the Swede.
Of regrets, however, he does have a few,
though what they were it is unlikely many had a clue.
Banning fox hunting is one thing about which he is contrite
believing tearing defenceless animals to pieces is really all right.
His greatest regret is apparently the Freedom of Information Act
that allows public bodies’ and politicians’ transgressions to be tracked.
He fears it will be used by the media he describes as a feral beast
to tell tax payers the names of the M.P.’s by whom they were fleeced.
To make miscreants of all ages behave
Tony was struck by a stunning brainwave.
On them an Anti-Social Behaviour Order would be bestowed
to let their neighbours know they had been Asbo’d.
Instead of being the hoped-for success
they only caused the wrong-doers’ victims distress.
For those awarded Asbos took it as a fact
that they were being ordered to engage in an anti-social act.
Many readers must be left confounded
when he proclaims for all things American his adulation unbounded.
His descriptions of U.S. presidents are so beyond the fringe
they would make any normal reader cringe.
He heaps so much praise on Clinton and, of course, on Obama
one half expects he will compare Barack to the Dalai Lama.
Do the Americans he so venerates include those who swear their president is a fraud
and lies when he says he was not born abroad?
When of his best buddy George W. he gives his opinion
his views are that of any obedient minion.
By tying his flag to his hero’s mast
he hoped as a similar world leader to be cast.
Shoulder to shoulder they stood on centre stage
as they cooked up how best their war to wage.
Tony was lucky he was not invited with Bush on the deck to stand
when his mission accomplished pose showed who was not in command.
Now that George W.’s Decision Points is about to appear
will it give Tony Blair reason to cheer?
Is he on pins and needles waiting to know
if the book someone wrote for his chum will be a quid pro quo?
Nothing could be worse than Tony’s version of the truth I got to thinking.
But I was wrong – they now tell us the moon is shrinking.