appears on television day after day.
to show off all her cooking skills.
like chopping, frying, baking and using grills.
Her performances can be quite charming
though her exuberance is at times alarming.
When it seems she may bounce right off the screen
we assume she has imbibed too much caffeine.
Though she never seems to feel the heat
all that energy leaves her viewers beat.
So, while her tasty dishes they may very well crave
they prepare their dinners in the microwave.
She has the ability her audiences to divert
and has never been known anyone to hurt.
But now a blogger called Maglalang,
has attacked her with a peabrained harangue.
In a blog whose name is not worth mention
she brought a sinister fact to our attention.
That Miss Ray, in wearing a scarf with a Paisley design,
was blatantly announcing that her intent was malign.
While getting her knickers tied into a twist,
she proclaimed that Rachel must be a terrorist!
That something ominous lies behind that smile
with which she manages her audiences to beguile.
On learning that, to the calendar I had to quickly run
to make sure the date was not April one.
But no, we are in the month of May
when, it seems, bloggers as well as donkeys bray.
Is Maglalang telling us, so we will not cause a scare,
we must avoid Scottish Paisley patterns on what we wear?
But what about our scarves with Scottish plaids?
Will they strike terror into the neighbourhood lads?
One must allow that in one activity Rachel is at fault
and to which she immediately should call a halt.
She used her scarf for a company that urges us doughnuts to dunk
as if we did not already have enough of food that’s junk.
How would company bosses react to such an idiot claim?
Surely they would not on Rachel lay the blame?
But Dunkin Donuts their ad were indeed quick to pull,
proving the hole is in their CEO’s skull.
* Written on 30 May 2008